In the Hoffman household, we try to make chores an event that everyone takes part in. My oldest daughter, who is six, has a few responsibilities such as collecting trash from each room, making sure the cat is fed, and cleaning up her shoes and clothes in her room. The middle kiddos, who are 5 and 3, are responsible for less duties but still have their own jobs. Putting away toys in the playroom and placing bath toys in the basket are some of the tasks they are asked to complete. The baby gets off the hook for the most part – his only job is to be cute (which he does a fantastic job at!).
I know families that have the same philosophy as me in making sure their children are learning responsibility and helpfulness early on. On the other hand, I also know some families that believe their babies should never have to lift a finger when it comes to household chores. Their mentality is such that their child’s only job is to play and be happy.
The experts believe that chores are an important part of childhood and for good reason. According to Center for Parenting Education, “research indicates that those children who do have a set of chores have higher self-esteem, are more responsible, and are better able to deal with frustration and delay gratification, all of which contribute to greater success in school.”
Much like how we learn how to cook and do laundry, there are several different methods to use in having your children participate in chores – and no one is more right or wrong than the other – just a different approach.
Approach #1: Completing Chores to Earn an Allowance – this allows for parents to give their children an incentive, if you will, for a job well-done; also instills a good work ethic early on.
Approach #2: Chores and Allowance are Separate – while the kids are still given an allowance, some chores are just “part of the job” and are not paid.
Approach #3: Chores to Earn Privileges – similar to an allowance, the child is paid for the completion of their chores. They are paid in privileges rather than money.
Okay, so what kind of chores should your kids be doing? Great question! Here is a list of age-appropriate chores for kiddos from toddlers to teens. {You can find a more comprehensive list here at https://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/age-appropriate-chores/}
Toddlers (Ages 2-3)
- Help making their bed.
- Pick up and put away toys.
- Take dirty laundry to laundry room.
- Fill the pet’s food dish.
Preschoolers (Ages 4-5)
- Get dressed independently.
- Make their bed w/ minimal help.
- Bring toys from car to house.
- Set/clear the table.
- Match socks.
- Hang towels in the bathroom.
- Clean their room, with supervision.
Early Elementary (Ages 6-8)
- Make bed independently.
- Get ready for the day independently.
- Vacuum individual rooms.
- Fold and put away laundry.
- Put dishes from dishwasher away.
- Empty indoor trash cans.
Middle Elementary/Tween (Ages 9-11)
- Take care of personal hygiene independently.
- Keep bedroom clean.
- Responsible for homework and belongings.
- Wash dishes.
- Prepare easy meals with little assistance.
- Learn to use washer and dryer.
- Take trash to curb for pick-up.
- Rake leaves.
- Clean bathrooms with supervision.
Middle School/Pre-Teen (Ages 12-16)
- Set their own alarm clock.
- Change bed sheets and help with bi-annual cleaning.
- Dust, vacuum, and wash dishes.
- Clean the mirrors.
- Mow the lawn with supervision.
- Babysit.
- Prepare an occasional family meal.
- Responsible for library card/books.
- Do assigned homework without prompting.
Of course, you can change up how you divvy out family chores in your house. Make chores fun and reward the children for helping out. And please, don’t compare yourself to Sally or Jen. Sally is clearly missing out on having her kids help her do daily tasks and Jen is sort of a drill sergeant who doesn’t know how to let her kids have fun. The point is, comparison is no good any way you look at it so do what is right and what works for your family.
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